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cupcakegirl's Cancer BlogNovember 26, 2008
Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Well, 2008 is almost over. There is so much to be thankful for this year. Lots of loss as well. Not sure what to focus on at times. I still feel like giving up at times. I really miss my Dad. I got his death certificate in the mail today. I have been really strong and pushing hard to get BFC up but I am running out of steam. I am tired. I am angry that my Dad is gone. I need him back. I relied on him so much. I love you all. Kathleen
November 25, 2008
Hey guys, Miss you all heeps. I have been ridiculously busy getting BFC up and going. Maybe this Monday we will be starting business. I had a bad day because once again I thought I was ok to go off my anti-depressants. I dropped again like a hot cupcake. I am going back on and staying on. I am complete dis-belief that my Pop pop is gone. I miss him so much. I got approved for wastewater permit today and I wanted to call my Dad to ask him what that meant. He has created a hugh loss in my life. I am thinking it is time to fill it with a Husband. I am going to talk to Dave about what I want. I adore him and I know he adores me. Life is so interesting and overwhelming all at once. I feel like I want to go into the wild and make a very primal and very loud scream. Love you all. I am always here even though my hands lately have been covered in paint and my hair covered in dust. All my Cupcake. Kathleen Kathleen, Nice to hear from you, I was thinking of you. I am amazed how strong you are with keeping busy despite the difficult time you’re going through with loss. It sounds like BFC is ready for business! Your dad must be proud of you. Hang in there. Hugs, I live in Denver and would love to come and get some delicious cupcakes. Where will your store be? Good eats and a good cause..what more could one want? Nan Happy Thanksgiving—hope you had one. I did even though I cried. Don’t rush into anything re marrying cause you miss your dad. I heard you say adore but I didn’t see the word Love each other. Just a word of caution and there is a saying; don’t do anything after the death of a loved one until after at least a year has passed. Take this advice from a woman who rushed into marriage several times and lived to regret it. Take your time and concentrate on your project; those cupcakes look so delicious—I wish I could eat one right now! smile I still miss my dad and he’s been gone for years. So I understand your pain and loss. But it will get better as time goes on. God bless you. Love, hugs and prayers, sweete2 better known as Ethel Craven-Sweet Kathleen,
November 15, 2008
Just wanted to say that I am home and am trying to stay busy. Thank you for everyone who wrote me. I worked on the cupcake store all day and bought wood flooring with the money my Dad left me. He will hold me up when I am there. Life will be different now without him. I feel completely fearless and am going for it with 1000% gusto. I really hope that my Dad meets Gemma and Wes in heaven. I have been reading everyone’s posts. Sonia, my heart goes out to you about your doggie. My Hanky died last year of cancer, my cat too. I am not writing anyone because I feel so numb. My love and support to you all. XO It’s so good to hear from you. I am so sorry for your loss. I know what you are feeling. My father was my very best friend and I lost him as well. I’m happy you are back and focused on your awesome store. What an adventure you are in for. And just think of all the angels that will be watching over you and your cupcakes. By the way, your cupcakes look so good that everytime I see pictures I want to reach in and grab one! Love, Welcome back! Can’t wait to see the store. Hi gal. good to see ya again, I have some family near you they want to know when the cupcake shop will be up and running. Where will be housed. They will love to have some yummy goodies. Hug Sherri I really feel for you and your loss of your Dad. I to this day miss mine so much that it still hurts. I do however remember his words of wisdom and try to follow by example. Your Dad has great company up above and surely they are just painting better pictures for when we arrive. So sorry about your dad. There never is a time that it seems okay to lose your parents. Mu dad died when I was 12, so I really haven’t missed him. But my step-dad is 91 and in failing health. He has been my dad for 41 years. I love him dearly, and even at 91 it seems too soon to have to say goodbye. Your cupcakes are indeed scrumptuous looking. I am so happy that you can focus on your wonderful little business. Here’s to you! Gaile hey cupcakegirl,, it is good to see that you know your dad is with you ,, one thing that i would ask of you is that you do not overwork yourself to get things ready,,, i know that you are full of energy at the moment and that you also need something to keep you busy, girl,, but think what lies ahead,, You still have your health to take care of and don’t ever forget it Do you make turkey cupcakes? This is my first Thanksgiving since my daughter decided she and I were vegetarians. A turkey cupcake would sure hit the spot. Take care and send me an invite for the opening, I am a cupcake taste tester. No really I have years of extensive training and what not….call me Mac
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I am glad you have BFC to focus on. I wish I were well and didn’t have such a difficult time with my chemo or I would be right there helping you paint.
I lost my Dad 3 yesrs ago and I know what you are feeling since my Dad was my very best friend. Time will help you heal, but right now focus in BFC it will help. Keep busy, but son’t wear yourself out.
Mych love & happy Thanksgivivng
Sonia
Thank you for the wishes. My dad committed suicide when I was 12. But my step dad has been wonderful since I was 15 (46 years!).
He is struggling with melanoma now and it is so hard on all of us. When he dies it will change the face of our family. I adore him and he has always been there in my times of need. Now my mom’s heart is breaking because she is losing both of us. Family is so important and I am so sorry that losing your dad has been so hard on you. Having BFC to work on and devote your energy to is the best medicine. Don’t give up! Your dad would be so proud of you for persevering. Hang in there, who could pass up a delicious cupcake! Hugs, Gaile
Happy Thanksgiving! I think I understand how you feel. Its so empty when you lose your best friend-its a palpable void. I’m sorry. Are you spending today with any friends?
I know BFC will turn out great. In fact, I’m ready to place an order! =o)
XOXOXOXOXO!Dear Kathleen; I’m so sorry you are missing your Dad. Yes at special times like Thanksgiving and Xmas, seem to be so very hard. It reminds us of how fleeting a life can be. I’m sure you know that he loves you and that he would want you to do your very best to carry on with your business, putting forth your very best parts of you. That is his wish so hopefully you will find some kind of energy to perservere through the bad feelings of loss and turn it into a renewed strength. IT is natural for you to feel blue. I loved my Dad so much and he has been gone for 8 long years. I just can’t believe how time passes but you will never forget, trust me, on how much love a Dad can have for their children. It is inspirational when you really look closely.
May time heal your broken heart, and help you find an inner peace.
Weezie